Pull Me Out - Intellectual

[Verse 1]

2019 it’s getting hard for me to count my blessings

All last year I was obsessing, shit done start getting messy

All my homies trapping, 12 got em all stressing

I’m going down with them man, fuck, this is my life and that shit get depressing

And although it seems like the grass is greener on the other side

Let me tell y’all it’s not, man I been thinking suicide

Wake up then go back to sleep, what am I doing right?

Looking back two years ago I swear that I was too alive

And now, I barely wanna go outside

Barely talk to my own family, I look you in the eyes

And tell you everything is perfect but in truth, I liе

I can’t begin to tell y’all how I do inside

Cut off еveryone hoping to get more creative

That was back in August and now that just seems crazy

Now it’s February and this loneliness begins to phase me

My parents just think that I’m rude and lazy

But I swear that I hate this, I ain’t tryna live like this

Left Mexico for better lives man I live like shit

And that ain’t your fault, trust me this is all on me

Fuck, I miss when teachers would call on me

And I’d be forced to participate. To interact

With the people in my class, gave that up in a flash

Thinking “fuck, this is ass”. I won’t be living like trash

Well now I’m like that, and that’s where I’m at

Now I stare at the metal that’s in my pistol

Everything I tried to avoid I slid right into

Like driving on icy roads, writing while shit get cold

Fighting until no soul, homie this ain’t no joke

I wish that I could just pull out a magic wand

And poof that shit is gone, begging, I ask someone to pull me out

Thinking, “am I your son?” Wishing there was someone

[Chorus]

To pull me out. Please pull me out

I’m dying of thirst, I’m in a drought

I want to be great I have no doubt

If you see me lacking please call me out

These dreams haunt me now. It’s on right now

I can’t change the channel I’m falling down

I’m in a hole, someone please pull me out

Or take this 40 and put me out

[Verse 2]

Never been the type to ask for help. Been too scared

Even when I was in school and clearly wasn’t prepared

I’d rather fail than ask for help, man the answer’s right there

Just brace myself and hope for the best, you think that’s fair?

Why do I do this to myself?

Is it because of all the cards that I have been dealt

Is it because I’m unprepared for what’s next like a belt

Is it because I’m like an ice cube in heat bout to melt

I know the reason but to scared to admit it

Will I keep my secrets hidden till I’m finished?

Thinking bout death got my head dizzy and spinning

Should I frame my death, leave you to find out who did it?

Would you even attempt to piece the puzzle?

Or would you just ignore it and install a muzzle?

Never speak about me like Tom Riddle, then I cook and bubble

And come back for all you fuckers so you feel my struggle

Then come back and hustle, and flex on every bitch yeah check the muscle

I hit next when I shuffle

Fix the deck then reshuffle

I need to turn this solo to a double

I'm good at first but always fumble

Always taking my shit out illegally then talk rebuttals

I need to chill and cuddle, or I’ll crack and crumble

Maybe I’ll be better when I’m out the puddle, in a couple

Till then you can catch me bored as fuck up in Russell